Three Knocks
by licensedtobuild
Summary: Even after Elsa brings back summer, she still sometimes tries to hide her feelings behind a closed door. Can Anna get her to open up?


Sometimes, on long, dull afternoons, Anna finds herself wandering through the castle. She never knows what she's looking for… maybe it's one of those things where she'll know it when she sees it, but she nevertheless wanders for hours on end. Through the ballroom to admire the paintings she had spent so long staring at as a child, down the long hallways flanked with empty suits of armor and across the wide courtyards and lawns within the castle gates. The doors are open now, and everyone is technically free to wander about as they see fit, but Anna tends to stay close to home.

On one particularly boring afternoon, she wanders down the hallway that leads to the queen's chambers on an impulse. Elsa spends most of her time when she is not traveling or meeting with Arendelle's other officials in her study in the east wing of the castle, where their parents used to live and work. Anna tries to avoid the entire wing and the haunting memories it possesses, but on that afternoon, though she can't quite figure out why, she's drawn to Elsa's chambers. She knows she'll probably get chastised for bothering Elsa while she's working and she should probably just wait until the evening when they eat dinner together, but still she strides down the long hallway toward the thick oak doors.

She pauses when she reaches them, one fist frozen in mid-air. The hesitation is there still, despite Elsa's reassurances that the doors will always open for her, even just to say come back later. The hallway is completely silent aside from the wind through an open window nearby. It's so sunny outside, and so dark inside.

Anna knocks three times on the door.

"Elsa?" she asks timidly. She hears shuffling and the quiet thump of something hard landing on something else hard, and soft padding before the door creaks open. Elsa's face appears the doorframe, blocking Anna from seeing the rest of the study. "Sorry to… bother you, but –"

"Anna," Elsa interjects with a tender smile. Anna stares at her sister's face for a second, taking in every single detail about her. Her hair is pulled back in a simple knot at the base of her neck instead of her usually braid, and her eyes keep flitting over Anna's shoulder. "I'm… in the middle of something," she pauses, glancing down at the floor briefly before cutting back up to Anna's face, "but I promise that I'll come down for dinner in a few hours once I've… I just need to deal with this by myself. I'll be down soon." Anna tries to look over Elsa's shoulder, but Elsa slides the door closed a bit further.

"Are you okay?" Elsa glances down the hallway again. Anna stares down at the door handle, and her heart drops. Elsa has conveniently hidden her hands behind the door.

"I'm fine, Anna. Please just let me deal with this alone." Anna narrows her eyes.

"Show me your hands," she says gently.

"Anna –"

"Elsa, you don't have to hide from me." Elsa can't quite look Anna in the eye. "Talk to me." Elsa doesn't speak, and finally relents, stepping away from the door. Anna nudges it open slowly and steps into the room.

"It's not as bad as it looks, I promise. I'll clean it up. I just needed to –" Anna slowly spins, taking in as much of the large room as she can.

"Wow," is all she can exhale.

The room has exploded into ice formations, but not the sharp jagged spikes that she had conjured at the coronation ball. Instead, Elsa has somehow created smooth curved splashes of ices, and statues of people, and buildings, and frozen water fountains arcing through the air, and perfect blasts of ice spiderwebbing on the walls, but everything is contained and under control. There is none of the chaos that used to accompany Elsa's outbursts. Nothing is destroyed or even damaged in the slightest.

"Elsa, this is… beautiful." Elsa smiles that shy little half-smile of pride mixed with nerves. "I have to ask, though… why? Is everything okay?" She reaches out to touch Elsa's shoulder tenderly. Elsa shirks a bit under the touch, but doesn't recoil like she used to. "Talk to me." Elsa doesn't speak, only gesturing across Anna to the wall to the left of the window.

Anna slowly walks over to the wall, where the only decoration is an enormous painting. As she nears, the figures in the painting become clearer, and Anna's heart drops.

Her parents stare back at her, stone-faced and lifeless.

"Elsa," she sighs. She turns to look at Elsa, but a glint from the sunlight on the picture frame pulls her attention back to her parents' painting. She takes a step toward the wall and realizes where the glint came from.

The painting is framed in dark wood of some kind, but framing the frame itself is a thin twisting rope of ice clinging to the wallpaper. As she gets closer, she realizes that it's multiple lines of delicate ice, twisting, folding and braiding over themselves like a frozen vine of ivy, thinner than Anna's littlest finger.

"Elsa, this is incredible," she sighs. She can feel Elsa pacing behind her, and turns to face her sister. "What happened?" Elsa's kneading her hands together in front of her, and Anna catches them in her own and squeezes gently.

"Do you know what Papa's last words to me were?" Anna shakes her head. "'You'll be fine, Elsa.' That's the last thing he ever said to me."

"Oh, Elsa…"

"I didn't hug him or Mama. I didn't hug them and I didn't tell them that I love them and I didn't go to the funeral and I left you alone for so long, Anna." Elsa speaks faster and faster, straining against Anna's hands. "You spent so long alone and I was right there but there was nothing I could do about it because I just couldn't open the door and I couldn't hurt you again and I couldn't go to the funeral, Anna." Wordlessly, Anna drops her hands and wraps her arms around Elsa's shuddering shoulders. Even though Elsa's face is pressed against her shoulder, Anna can still hear her muffled voice, repeating over and over again. "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry."

"I forgive you," Anna replies quietly over Elsa's mantra, not knowing what else to say. Elsa's fingers come up against her shoulder blades and dig in slightly, clinging and squeezing. "I forgive you and I love you so much." Elsa stops murmuring, but keeps clinging to Anna's shoulder blades.

"I'm so afraid that I'll disappoint them. That I'll disappoint you," she whispers. Anna pulls away and palms Elsa's pale cheeks.

"How could you possibly disappoint me? I mean, look at this." She gestures wildly at the room. "This is magnificent. Look at what you've created. This is… I mean, this is incredible." Elsa clutches at herself, almost trying to fold in away from the world. "Papa and Mama would be so proud of you."

"How can you be so sure?" Anna smiles softly.

"Look at what you've created. Look at your study. You've never made something this intricate and fragile before, and everything is still in place and intact." Elsa follows Anna's hand as she traces around the room before looking back at Anna, still so unsure. "You can _control_ it," she emphasizes. Elsa looks down at her open hands and back up at the painting of their parents.

"I can _control_ it…" Elsa's voice quivers slightly, still so insecure about her powers.

"You don't have to conceal it anymore. You are allowed to feel anything and everything that you need to feel." Elsa's lip quivers and telltale tears shimmer in her eyes.

"I miss them so much, Anna," she whispers, her voice gravelly with emotion. Without another word, Anna pulls her back into a hug, one hand resting on the back of her head.

"It's okay to feel," Anna murmurs in response. Elsa's shoulders start to shake. "It's okay. I'm here," A quiet sob escapes into Anna's shoulder, "and I love you." Together, they sink to the floor, still wrapped in each other's arms. "I love you so, so much, and I am so proud of you." Amidst the sobs, Anna can make out four watery words.

"I… love… you… too."


End file.
